Artist: Bill Engvall or Ray Stevens

Christmas Day will not be very merry
Explaining to the children will be hard
Well it's Christmas Eve tonight
And our beagle picked a fight
With some reindeer that were grazing in our yard

I let the dog outside to do his business
I forgot to hook his leash up to the peg
First he and Cupid came to blows
Then he bit Rudolph on the nose
And when I got there he was eyeing Prancers leg


Now I'm getting sued by Santa Claus
He's claiming mental anguish in his case
Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus
And my kids won't even look me in the face

I tried to throw myself on Santa's mercy
I begged him but I wasn't gettin' thru
I said " it's all your fault you know "
He said " now how can that be so? "
I said " because we got the stupid dog from you!"

Now I'm getting sued by Santa Claus
He's claiming mental anguish in his case
Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus
And my kids won't even look me in the face

Oh I'm gettin' sued by Santa Claus
He's claiming mental anguish in his case
Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus
And my kids won't even look me in the face

Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus
Now I'm bunkin' with the beagle at his place

Spoken: Couldn't we just settle out of court?

Happy Christmas

Mmmmm oooo ohhhh
Ahhhhhaa

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
(You gave it away)
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
(Special)
Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance but you still catch my eye
Tell me baby do you recognize me
Well it's been a year it doesn't suprise me

Happy Christmas
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you" I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
(You gave it away)
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
(Special)

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
(Special)

Oh oh
Oh why baby

Ooooo

A crowded room friends with tired eyes
I'm hiding from you and your soul of ice
My God I thought you were someone to rely on
Me I guess I was a shoulder to cry on

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man undercover but you tore him apart
(Tore me apart)
Ooo ooo
Now I found a real love
You'll never fool me again

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
(You gave it away)
This year to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
(Special)

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
(You gave me away)
This year to save me from tears
(Oh)
I'll give it to someone special
(Special)
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
(Gave you my heart)
A man undercover but you tore him apart
Maybe next year I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone special

Special
Someone
Someone
I'll give it to someone
(Special)
I'll give it to someone now

Who'll give me something in return
(I'll give it to someone)
(I'll give it to someone)
Hold my heart and watch it burn
(I'll give it to someone)
(I'll give it to someone)
I'll give it to someone special

I thought you were here to stay
How can love be for a day
I thought you were someone special
Gave you my heart
(I'll give it to someone)
(I'll give it to someone)

Last Christmas I gave you my heart
You gave it away
I'll give it to someone
I'll give it to someone

(Ad-lib Fade out)